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01 January 2008
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With each passing day, I find gratitude in the fact I'm no longer closer to you; or as close as we were before. And with today, I finally realise it is not a bad thing to lose you to them.I'm almost never judgemental with people. Especially over petty things like how they dress. How they dress is up to them and has nothing to do with me, at any cost. But to see you sprawled in sins with them, to see you, the boy I thought I knew so well- in close distances with them in a place almost full of sins, made me see how much you've changed. No longer are you the boy who I thought deserved my love - undivided love. The love you got before this, was wayyy much more than what any other ordinary friend got. But you weren't ordinary. You were special. But not anymore. I wasn't shocked. I knew I'll see it one day. I showed the picture to Maz and she went, "Oh my god," and I laughed, lightheartedly. I saw it coming; I just didn't want to believe it. I held on to the hope you were still my boy; the boy so fine in the past. I'm sorry but I can't help but to be judgemental of you and your friends. Maybe because I feel sore that I've lost you to them, that I started judging them. Maybe this year, it'll be much better. You will still remain important, but I know the days of crying over you, over our friendship are now over. I'm not going to be as immature as I was in the past; hoping you'll get jealous at the thought of me being close with other guys - almost as close as you & me were. All I wish for, is just for one day, for you to notice I'm no longer there beside you - that I'm gone. And I wish for that one day you'll miss me and wished things like this never happened. But if it doesn't happen, it's okay because I do not indulge with happiness in your misery. Let me remember you as someone so pure. Let me remember our friendship untainted. |
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nor liyana mohd khalis.i'm always in love with pretty boys. like as if i don't learn from experience, i always give in to sweet words. and i never learn from the past. i'm vulnerable to hurt, but i'd like to believe i'm stronger than i seem. jauh di dasar hatiku, aku tahu aku masih kasihimu dan menyintaimu. namun kau sudah berpunya, kau sudah bercinta. disini kita berakhir, tergantung segala cerita dan kisah lama. wishlist
an arsenal jersey please.to watch a play. tagboard
affiliates
ayn
bani
complexite
dynn
erdiah
ekah
fizah
jass
joyce
maz
matt
nisa
nette
raz
yaya |